BY FRANCESCA LEWIS

Lesbian.com

Your character has an interesting perspective on the Dead – was that hard to relate to?

Celia’s relationship with the dead is one of caretaker. Marlene had a hard time with the dead! One of the hardest scenes I had to shoot was the one where Nick bring backs Luis.  The make up on this show is amazing and very real looking. Arturo, who plays Luis, was foaming at the mouth and spitting blood out.  His eyes had these contacts which made his eyes look dead! And there I am having a love affair with him! I had a hard time NOT gagging! But in all seriousness, Celia’s relationship with the dead goes back to the Mexican culture.  Day of the Dead!  Death is just the next step.  And the living very much continue to communicate with the dead.  Very much like Ofelia speaks to her mother at the altar.  Now, we don’t keep them in the basement! But there is a big element of that.  Now, like Celia says, we can’t see the dead, but they have always walked among us!

Celia is certainly an antagonist, but is she a villain

Well, Marlene doesn’t think she is a villain! I try not to judge my characters.  Even the most horrible serial killer doesn’t think they are doing anything wrong. Celia is just assisting with the inevitable: death! We are all heading in that direction!

What did it mean to you to play the mother of the first gay character on the series?

I was thrilled! I love that fact that nothing was really made out of it! It was just introduced and was not discussed! I think it is becoming more visible on TV. I work on The Fosters too, and I love that show for the same reasons! It is just a family show that centers around love.  It doesn’t matter who you love! And “family” doesn’t necessary look like the Brady Bunch anymore! I really hope that this isn’t an issue in the future. Everybody go out and VOTE!

Diversity has always been a real problem in Hollywood and, though it has improved, it hasn’t improved anywhere near enough. Do you think being a latinx actor is any easier now than it was when you started out, in terms of roles and representation?

Yes I do think it’s easier.  But we are not yet properly represented on TV like the African American community. I always say it, we don’t have our own Tyler Perry or Oprah! When I started, I was still married to my daughter’s dad. He is Rodriguez. That was not a choice back then. My reps at the time wanted to change it to Rodrick. I was born Ana Marlene Forte Machado, I said. “Pick one!” Even Machado was too ethnic 21 years ago. Now no one blinks at Rodriguez or Lopez. But we still have a long way to go.

Your real life backstory is a fascinating one – can you tell me a bit about your life before you started acting?

am the oldest of three girls, the only one born in Cuba. I was very sheltered and married my high school sweetheart.  Within a year I was pregnant and he wanted two more! LOL – I was done. I always knew I wanted to act and I just knew, even back then, that I could not have more kids and be an actor.  So we played house for four years; until we graduate college.  He went off to be a doctor and I went off to be an actress.  I really didn’t get started till the late 1980’s.  I ran my own video store back at the start of the whole thing for about 5 years.  And then Blockbuster hit the scene and I exited stage left! I had just gotten into The LAB (Latino’s Actor’s Base) at Intar and I saw the writing on the wall.  I was not getting any younger so I moved to Manhattan. And that’s when it all began.

You’ve appeared in a lot of TV shows over the years, you’ve pretty much been in everything – any highlights? Any current shows you’d love to appear in?

I would love to do The Walking Dead but that’s not going to happen unless the east coast meets the west coast! I really loved working on Dallas.  I enjoyed the city of Dallas and the cast was just the best.  And I must say that Fear The Walking Dead has been the ultimate roller coaster so far! The fans are the amazing and I really enjoyed bringing Celia Flores to life!

Francesca Lewis is a queer feminist writer from Yorkshire, UK. She has written for Curve Magazine, DIVA Magazine, xoJane and The Human Experience. You can find her opinion pieces on Medium. 

The post Fear The Walking Dead’s Marlene Forte on Diversity, Culture and Dealing with The Dead first appeared on Lesbian.com.

New Year’s Eve revelers at Atlanta’s My Sister’s Room

BY CANDY PARKER
Lesbian.com

Wherever one travels, it’s always nice to feel as though you’re among friends. For lesbians, it’s sometimes difficult to find a welcoming bar or club when jet-setting around the world.

In order to help you follow the rainbow wherever you may roam, Lesbian.com compiled this list of some of the best gay and lesbian bars from around the world. Not all are “lesbian-only” but they are “lesbian-welcoming.”

We’ve provided website links wherever available and a brief description for the bars that aren’t conveniently found on the web.

Australia
Sydney — Sly Fox Enmore

Canada
Montreal — Le Drugstore

England
London — Ruby Tuesdays

France
Paris — Rosa Bonheur

Paris — Les Taulières

Italy
Rome — Garbo
Garbo’s is a small gay cocktail bar in the Travestere district which attracts young LGBT locals and tourists. Garbo’s offers good music and food and a selection of beers, cocktails and wines.

Florence — BK Bar

Mexico
Juarez — Living
Ultra-modern and upscale, Living is a chic nightlife spot playing popular club tunes in a slightly more sophisticated atmosphere, attracting Mexico’s upper class and LGBT travelers seeking a nightclub with a bit more of a worldly edge.

Mexico City — Butterflies
A traditional Mexican gay club located in a huge warehouse, playing the best dance music (English and Spanish pop) and offering some of the most professional drag and strip shows in Mexico.

Netherlands
Amsterdam — Vivelavie

Amsterdam — Cafe Bordó

Spain
Barcelona — Aire – Sala Diana

U.S.
Atlanta — My Sister’s Room

San Francisco — The Lexington Club

Seattle — The Wildrose Bar and Restaurant

St. Louis — Novak’s

Want to tell us about your favorite lesbian-friendly bar? Just drop a note in the “Leave a Reply” section below.

The post A jet-setter’s guide to the best lesbian bars around the world first appeared on Lesbian.com.

There is an abundance of artifacts that represent the history and culture of the LGBT communities. Items like the walking stick that once belonged to gay civil rights pioneer Bayard Rustin, or foundational documents that established the first gay rights organization, the Mattachine Society, are scattered throughout the country.

Many of these artifacts have already been discarded, lost or destroyed. But the National LGBT Museum, which is making strides toward acquiring a building to house the first national historical institution for the community, was created to redress this problem — and also to celebrate, showcase and share our history through these artifacts. The museum has reached a milestone by completing the preliminary work of establishing a business model, creating a fundraising/development plan, collecting market research, and assembling a team of experts who comprise the board and leadership councils.

So far, the museum has collected nearly 5,000 artifacts from figures such as Greg Louganis, Bayard Rustin, Tyler Clementi, and Frank Kameny. These objects (many of which were destined for the landfill) will have the platform afforded by a cultural institution in our nation’s capital, because they document episodic moments in LGBT history. For example, when Greg Louganis’ head collided with the diving platform during the 1988 Seoul Olympics, misinformation about HIV led to concern over whether other divers risked infection by the virus. This story, told through artifacts donated by the diver, is an integral part of LGBT history, and Louganis’ two gold medal-winning dives were a momentous Olympic victory for the United States.

Read more at Washington Blade

Washington Blade is America’s leading gay news source.

The post Museum hopes to preserve LGBT history first appeared on Lesbian.com.

According to a new study called the “LGBT Asian and Pacific Islander Individuals and Same-Sex Couples,” 2.8 percent of Asian and Pacific Islander and (API) adults residing in the US identify as LGBT. “Detailed data analysis reveals vulnerable LGBT subgroups including Pacific Islanders and Native Hawaiians, female same-sex couples, couples where both partners are API and couples with children,” said Kastanis. “These groups tend to experience lower rates of health insurance coverage, lower academic achievement, higher rates of non-citizenship status, and higher rates of unemployment than other API couples.”

“The findings show that API individuals in same-sex couples are more likely than those in different-sex couples to both have a college degree. However, API same-sex couples raising children have much lower levels of education than their different sex counterparts, which may explain some of their economic vulnerability,” Gates said in the report.

Read more at dot429.com

The post Study explores experiences of queer Asians and Pacific Islanders first appeared on Lesbian.com.

In case you missed it, the oldest and only lesbian bar in Philadelphia, Sisters Nightclub, shut its doors for good on Monday, August 7. Though a part of the LGBT scene for over almost two decades, Sisters took a drastic financial hit over the past few years and had to close up for good.

“I have not only lost a job, but a love/passion, a home away from home and an extended family,” Sisters manager Denise Cohen wrote on Facebook.

Read more at TheSeattleLesbian.com

The Seattle Lesbian online magazine reaches more than 188,000 readers per week globally.

The post Oldest, only lesbian bar in Philly closes its doors first appeared on Lesbian.com.

In light of the recent Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) ruling, OneGoodLove, the Internet’s leading relationship-focused online dating service for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) singles, announced the release of its “Marriage Equality State of the Date Report.” Findings of the report, based on a survey of 875 LGBT singles, suggest that while the Supreme Court ruling on DOMA and California’s Proposition 8 aren’t putting social pressure on gay and lesbian people to immediately “tie the knot,” many gay and lesbian singles are now more likely to consider marriage their ultimate relationship goal because of the court’s recent landmark decisions.

Improved Outlook on Marriage Since the DOMA Ruling

Sixty-three percent of LGBT singles surveyed said they were more likely to think of marriage as their ultimate dating goal now that the Supreme Court has struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), with only 35 percent saying that their outlooks have not changed.

When asked whether or not the recent cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their same-sex relationships in a more positive light, 37 percent of the LGBT participants said yes, 22 percent said no, and 41 percent said that their parents already see their relationships as a positive thing.

Thirty-eight percent of the transgender respondents said that the cultural shifts and gains in marriage equality would help their parents see their relationships in a more positive light, but only 13 percent said that their parents already see their relationships as a positive thing.

Eighty-seven percent of all LGBT singles reported that increases in same-sex marriage rights would not increase the societal pressure on them to settle down and tie the knot.

LGBT Marriage Material

Forty-four percent of gay and lesbian singles reported that honesty was the most important quality for a future husband or wife to have. Thirteen percent of lesbian women reported intelligence as the most important quality in a future wife, and 15 percent of gay men said a sense of humor was the most important quality in a husband.

Thirty-seven percent of all participants said that communication was the most important personal quality they would have to improve to make a future marriage work. Twenty percent said they would have to get their lives in better financial order to marry and live happily ever after.

Seventy-six percent of all gay and lesbian singles surveyed said they see marriage in their future. Only 66 percent of bisexual and 50 percent of transgender singles see marriage in their future.

LGBT Wedding Bells Ringing

Forty-two percent of all LGBT participants said they wanted a small wedding gathering of just friends and family, and 24 percent said they wanted a low-key ceremony and reception.

Only six percent of gay men wanted an “over the top party with everyone they had ever known,” while 18 percent of bisexual and 14 percent of lesbian singles wanted the same. None of the transgender respondents wanted an over the top wedding.

“This survey points to the tangible, romantic hopefulness in the gay and lesbian community right now,” said Frank Mastronuzzi, Co-founder and Chief Love Officer at OneGoodLove.com. “ Commemorating that hopefulness, on July 17, OneGoodLove.com launched a billboard in West Hollywood, California, reflecting the shifting dating and relationship goals emerging in the LGBT community. The billboard features two men kissing, with copy that reads: “First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage.”

For survey details, and to see the billboard, visit the OneGoodLove blog at: blog.onegoodlove.com

The post OneGoodLove poll: Marriage now ultimate dating goal for majority of LGBT singles first appeared on Lesbian.com.

American Apparel is ringing in LGBT Pride in a very big way.

The Los Angeles-based clothing retailer has teamed up with GLAAD for an exclusive line of T-shirts released in commemoration of LGBT Pride Month. Although the company has previously backed gay-relevant causes, the 2013 line is receiving extra praise for including the bisexual and transgender communities. The campaign will also feature a transgender model for the second year in a row, GLAAD officials report.

Read more at Huffington Post Gay Voices

The post American Apparel teams with GLAAD for LGBT Pride first appeared on Lesbian.com.

BY BUTCH JAXON

So, I’m here in Tokyo. I tell anyone who asks me that I have two favorite cities. One is Barcelona — for the weather, food (amazing charcuterie), people, architecture, you name it. It is a warm, inviting and beautiful city filled with gorgeous buildings, parks and women. Plus, I speak the language — mostly. The other is Tokyo. Why? It’s not the weather. Each of the three times I have been there, it has been cold (late October, early December, and late February). I’ve yet to make it during the coveted Cherry Blossom season. Then, what? Food? Not as much as Barcelona, recall that I despise sushi. Two things. The people and just how foreign it is.

THE PEOPLE

To a one, the people in Tokyo are absolutely ridiculous. Indeed, the people I have met there, the strangers who have gone out of their way (repeatedly) to help me, make me dislike Americans. We aren’t so friendly in comparison. The people are just so kind, considerate and interested in what you have to say. And service is king. The women are lovely, and the men all seem gay to me — the younger ones at least — and that makes me feel super comfortable. “Gay or European?” really should be “Gay or Japanese?” Oh, and I love the sense of style. Color! Patterns. A Scarf! Socks that are crazy patterns. Bring it. Love it. Plus, any country that is absolutely head over heels in love with Hello Kitty, or Kitty Chan, as she is affectionately called, is more than alright with me.

JUST HOW FOREIGN IT IS

This is kind of hard to explain. The thing about Tokyo is that it is so, so, so NOT America. I mean, it’s not the US, Canada, England or Scotland. Duh, Butch. It’s in Asia. No, I get that. What I mean is that it is the one place that I have been where I felt totally and absolutely out of my element. What do I mean by that? You can’t read the signs. In Italy, France, Portugal, Mexico and many other countries I can decrypt most words enough to figure out “police” versus “pub.” Not so here in Tokyo. If the picture next to the Hiragana word for Shinkansen didn’t let you know it was a train, you would be still searching — and you would miss your train that will absolutely be leaving on time without you.

Signs everywhere, but what do they say?

Most people do not speak English (or they might not let on that they do). Money from an ATM? Good luck. Want to use your cell phone? I don’t think so. It is an entire city that is homogeneous. Everyone looks very similar — and no one looks like me. By this, I do not mean to discount the amazing differences between Japanese people. No, not at all. What I mean is that much more than in the US or England, the people have similar coloring.

Now, that is not to say that there aren’t similar minded people there. That there aren’t Butches, lesbians, mothers, democrats, atheists, English speaking people, bow-tie wearing lovers of musicals, operas and craft beers. Of course there are. But more than any other place I have been, the people look similar to each other and they don’t look like me. I am still taller than most, blonder, bigger, and let’s face it whiter, more awkward and more rude. Try as I might not to be any of those last three.

Want me to prove it? When I travel there, with two different companies, I have been given a “handler.” It is so different, so much harder to get around and find your way, that companies assign someone to help you get from point A to point B. And, thank goodness.

So, it is indeed foreign. It is like being in a sea of beautiful Koi — all of whom it seems understand me and are unbelievably kind — and I am a flounder. Also, I am pretty much in love with the culture of respect. There may be other countries, other cultures, that value each other and respect each other the way the Japanese do, but I haven’t found them yet. Evidence the bow. I love this. It is not subservient or menial. It is a strong, self-possessed person giving way by bowing to another. It says, thank you. It says, I am sorry. I says, hello. How about this? When you leave your office at night, you stand near the door and bow to your colleagues saying Osakini Streshimas. Translation? “I am sorry that I am leaving before you.” How great is that? Even the ground crew for my plane leaving Tokyo bowed to the plane/pilot as we rolled away from the gate. It is a way to honor the other person. I freaking love the bow. How weird would it be if I just incorporated this into my everyday life back home in SoCal? I think I just might. Hello, bow. I am sorry that you had a bad day, bow. Thank you for serving me, bow. Sigh. The respect that this imparts is really ridiculous. I had a protracted conversation on my last evening with the younger colleagues about the bow, the significance, the depth of the bow. It was fascinating.

NOTHING IS LOST IN TRANSLATION

Even though I do not speak Japanese, I have learned enough to impress almost everyone I meet. I think this is more of a sign of how difficult (translation: foreign) the Japanese language is for Americans, rather than the strength of what I’ve learned. I would love to learn more. It is a beautiful language. When I listen to my colleagues and friends speak, I catch a word here and there (thank you, I’m sorry, we, I understand, no, yes, beer, please, woman), but it is nothing like when I hear any one speak a Romance language. I catch lots of those words. Again, foreign. Am I getting this across? And, yet, I feel welcome. Comfortable here.

Perhaps it is because I am at a point where I am trying to find difference. Searching for adventure. Seeking out places where I feel uncomfortable. I love it when English is the second language, or even better, not even on the sign. I think this is why I love Tokyo (and the other parts of Japan that I have visited). Maybe I just like being out of my own element. Way, way outside my comfort zone.

Whatever the reason, I don’t feel like anything is lost in translation even when I do not understand a single word of what is being said. It’s butch to be out of your element. Be Butch.

ButchOnTap is written by Butch Jaxon, a fledgling writer who has been a lesbian her whole life. Butch was raised in San Diego and is an accomplished lawyer. She loves to write, play any kind of sport or game, consume any kind of entertainment and is frequently found drinking lattes in a bookstore or discovering new beers at local micro-breweries.

The post Nothing is lost in translation first appeared on Lesbian.com.

Cynthia Nixon (right) and her… wife!… Christine Marinoni. What do you think they call each other?
Photo: HRC/ WENN

BY MEG STREIT
AfterEllen

Ever since I got married in January, I seem to have developed a bit of a stutter. Every time I have to introduce my wife or make reference to her (which feels like it is at least once every hour), I find myself stammering and tripping over the word “wife.” What is my problem? Why can’t I just say “wife” proudly and audibly like a self-respecting married lesbian?

Read more at AfterEllen.com

AfterEllen is the pop culture site that plays for your team

The post Wife? What to call her once you get married first appeared on Lesbian.com.

It’s been awhile since I updated the Queer Lexicography here at QueerFatFemme.com and I have been employing some gems in my real life lately that might apply to yours.

Textversation. This is that tendency to use texting like IMing was back in the day. (Remember AOL Instant Messenger?) Some people are more prone to this than others, but I go back and forth. Sometimes I only want to use texting for pertinent information shares, sometimes I want a meaningful conversation to continue. Also, certain couples I know are basically always in textversation with one another when not in the same room.

“We were in textversation for a solid week and then, BAM, nothing for like four days. What happened?”

Sending the Representative. This is a gem my friend Mackenzi introduced to me about that thing that happens when folks don’t show you who they really are when you date them. A particularly hilarious story accompanies this term that involves a suitor who engaged her intern to burn some cds she could keep in her car that would make Mackenzi think the suitor had good taste in music. It’s such a gift when your beau is being authentic!

“We were really vibing but it turns out they were totally sending the representative and I don’t actually know them at all.”

Sex Vortex. See also Kissing Vortex. This occurs when you’re in the kind of chemical magic with another human that time either stands still or ceases to exist when you’re having sex or kissing. I’ve had this happen to me, where I lose track of time and space, and also where my frien was watching me make out with someone at a dance party and said, “Bev, it was like time was slowing down watching you two.”

“We were supposed to have dinner at 7:30 but we accidentally fell into a sex vortex at 6 and didn’t realize it until 8:30. Oops.”

DTR conversation. My BFF Spunky and I have been using this for years. DTR stands for Define The Relationship and the DTR CONVO is totally important but not something to be rushed. Being okay with ambiguity is something I’ve acquired over the years (see, why I love a date not a date), after a couple of years of really intense emotional work. But, dang, before I turned 31 I would go crazy without a DTR.

“I’m not trying to have a DTR with you but I need you to not euphemize this as ‘hanging out.’”

Speaking of, let’s talk about the euphemism “hanging out.” I “hang out” with lots of folks. Let’s say I would actually hang out with pretty much all of my facebook friends. But I only sleep with/have slept with a small number of those people. I bristle at that common euphemism because if someone says they’re hanging out with someone I don’t know if they mean just like, chilling, with a friend or if they mean they are going to be doing it.

A friend of mine recently said that about someone she was sleeping with and I said, No, be more specific and she said, “Well, this is a girl I don’t spend money on and I’m not trying to woo. What do we call that? Is that just friends with benefits?” Dear readers who know more slang than I do, is there a term out there that I’m missing? Does everyone use the term “hanging out?” What if you’re not really friends but you just do it sometimes? What if it’s like somewhere before dating? Relationships are so complicated!

Originally published on QueerFatFemme.com

Bevin Branlandingham is your femmecee at QueerFatFemme.com where she chronicles the relentless pursuit of her joy.

The post Additions to the queer lexicography first appeared on Lesbian.com.