Dear Femme, 

I’ve been with my girlfriend for a little over a year and everything is going really well. We moved in together a few months ago and it’s been great to live with my best friend and come home to her everyday. And I do come home to her, I work a little bit later than she does, so by the time i get home, she has dinner waiting for me. And that’s so nice and I’m so lucky. But the problem is that dinner is always terrible. It’s just so bad, I would rather just microwave leftovers or get takeout than eat it. I don’t understand what she does to it. She thinks she’s a really good cook and I don’t want to burst her bubble. 

How can I tell her her cooking is terrible without ruining our relationship? I’m afraid she will be hurt and resent me and I would do anything to avoid hurting her feelings, or putting our relationship in jeopardy. Please help. 

Hungry in Ohio

Dear Hungry,

Of all the problems in the world, this isn’t a bad problem to have. If you and your girlfriend have as strong of a relationship as it sounds, you should be able to talk to her about this. Talking to her about this small problem is really good practice for when you have to talk about the more important problems that will crop up if you end up spending your entire lives together.

Maybe say something like, “I really appreciate it when you make dinner for me, it’s so nice to come home to that after a long day at work. But, sometimes the food you make is too ___” Insert whatever adjective you need too. I kind of want to know how she ruins this food. Is it too salty? Burnt to a crisp? Does she put ketchup on everything?

You could also say something like, “This food needs a little something, I really like kale with garlic not kale with ketchup.” Or whatever it is she’s doing. Eventually she will start taking notice of what you like and don’t like, and incorporating that into the meals she cooks.

If you’re too scared to address the problem directly, there are more subtle steps you can take. You guys can take a cooking class together and maybe she can incorporate some of the lessons learned into her dinner repertoire. You could watch some Food Network shows together and try to recreate the recipes. Or even find some recipes you like and send them over to her to make for dinner. Give her a back rub for being so accommodating to your cravings.

Good luck, Hungry! Let us know how it goes.

Have a question for me? Email me at askafemme@yahoo.com

About the Artist: Lee Ely is a Brooklyn based illustrator. For more about Lee visit http://www.latewerks.com, follow on Instagram @latewerks, like on Facebook and purchase their work at https://society6.com/latewerks.

The post Ask the Femme: I love my girlfriend, but I hate her cooking! first appeared on Lesbian.com.

If you happen to be in Cleveland, Ohio, and are looking for a casual place with a friendly atmosphere and good food, look no further than Latitude 41n.

Located in the avant garde Detroit Shoreway Neighborhood, one of many of Cleveland’s neighborhoods that are being reinvented, Latitude 41n (5712 Detroit Avenue; 216-961-0000; EatatLatitude41n.com) is popular among its residents and Clevelanders who venture to the neighborhood to check out the art studios, community theaters and trendy night spots and restaurants.

“It’s just a good area to be in,” says Kathy Brown, proprietor of Latitude 41n, about the hipster neighborhood. “It brings a lot of people down [to the neighborhood].” More >

The post Latitude 41n’s Kathy Brown Hits the Spot first appeared on Lesbian.com.

Fitness expert Richelle Melde
(Photo courtesy of Hollye Schumacher Photography)

Many of us live each day thinking that it is “normal” to feel bloated, lethargic, achy, gassy — The list goes on. This is very far from the truth.

In fact, all of these symptoms are an indication that you are eating something that doesn’t agree with you, otherwise known as food intolerance or food sensitivity. This type of intolerance is not an allergy to a food like the kind that needs to be treated immediately, such as a bee sting, but rather food intolerances are more delayed having reaction times from one hour all the way up to three days post consumption!

The four most common foods that can cause these reactions are corn, soy, dairy and gluten. Corn and soy are ingredients in almost every processed food, so unless you eat real food, it is impossible to avoid.

Gluten is the protein found in wheat, barley and rye. It changes the texture and taste of grains, so it is added to make food more palatable. And unless it’s raw dairy, it is highly processed and pumped full of chemicals, causing insidious reactions in your body and being stored in fat tissue.

Your gut controls 80-85 percent of your immune system, which is another reason to maintain digestive health. If you find that you are often sick, you might consider cleaning up your eating (and reducing stress) to help preserve your immune function.

Richelle Melde is the Fitness Expert for News Channel 12 EVB Live show (Phoenix, Ariz.) and has been seen on Fox, CBS, NBC and ABC, as well as in the AZ Republic and Business Journal. She has a B.S. in Psychology, Sociology and Women’s Studies and is a CHEK Practitioner and Holistic Life Coach.

The post Optimum health: Feeling bloated? It could be food sensitivity first appeared on Lesbian.com.

Vacation is the time to let go, relax and eat whatever you want, right? Yes and no. More and more gluttony is getting a beat down by us girls who want to treat our bodies like the temple it is, even while we are gallivanting around the world.

So, how do we strike the balance where we are putting good things into our bodies and still enjoying the tastes of life wherever our wandering feet take us as we spring into action for bikini-ready bodies and summer vacations?

To get to the bottom of the bowl or glass, Girls That Roam recently sat down with three nutrition experts to help us navigate getting our bodies ready for traveling without leaving our taste buds at home, embracing the adventure and staying healthy without skipping a beat.

People often go into one of two modes when they go on vacation: “fuck it” or “control it.” Both modes are extreme and not healthy.

Really, you don’t want to “Poopoopski,” like Charlotte did on the Big honeymoon rescue in Mexico when the girls carried Carrie getaway after she was jilted in her Vera Wang in the first “Sex and the City: The Movie” movie. Rather than indulging in healthy food and eating right, Charlotte attempted to control her food out of fear of being in a foreign country pulling one Poughkeepsie pudding after another out of her Prada for breakfast, lunch and dinner until she “Poopoopskied.” That’s a bad side effect of controlling it.

Concerned about catching something or eating bad food? The best way to get your body vacation ready, especially if you are traveling to countries in Asia and Latin America, is to take digestive enzymes, says Srinika Narayan, MS, Lac., a San Francisco-based nutritionist and owner of Srinika Healing & Nutrition.

“Just being safe in terms of not catching things, especially in other countries … I take digestive enzymes,” says Srinika, pointing out that amoeba or little parasites are food for the enzymes. “They break down the foods for me so it takes some stress off the digestive organs, especially since when eating out you tend to eat richer food than what you do at home.”

Srinika also suggests getting travel ready eating probiotics, such as sauerkraut or yogurt, basically fermented food that will help the “gut good bacteria” and “kind of keep the stomach happy.”

Srinika adds to be aware of any water-based food, such as chutney or sauces and of course ice, that’s where “dangerous water” sometimes slips into food.

If bacteria and bugs don’t worry us then gaining weight from indulging does.

“We go into a vacation worried about gaining weight so then we get really controlling and rigid with our food; that’s not healthy either,” says nutritionist Jamie Greenwood, of JamieLiving.com based in Albany, Calif.

“Fuck it! I’m on vacation”

On the other side of the plate there are the people who simply get that autopilot glaze over their eyes and let go when they are traveling or on vacation.

“We get a case of ‘fuck it.’ It’s like, ‘fuck it. I’m on vacation and I’m going to taste everything,’ and that is actually not listening to our body,” says Jamie, who blogs about feeding your body and soul at Body OnBoard.

Yeah, “I’m going to go to town,” chimes in Dana Kofsky, a nutrition stylist at Nutrition Styles in Los Angeles, Calif.

“People say ‘I’m on vacation, so I will eat what I want,’ versus staying present to their body and listening to their body,” says Dana, who encourages people to stop and listen to their body about what it really wants and how much it wants.

Stopping and listening is what Jamie calls honoring what you want versus what you think you want simply because you are on vacation, she says.

Picky, Picky

Sally in “When Harry Met Sally” wasn’t wrong when she was so precise while ordering her food. The waitress and Harry may have looked at her like she was crazy, but perhaps she was onto something and being her body’s advocate.

“You have to remember you are your body’s advocate, no one else is going to stand for your body unless you do,” says Jamie.

Vegetables are a hot commodity on the road. It can sometimes seem like restaurants are rationing the veggies; for what, we don’t know.

“When it comes to traveling it’s really hard to get vegetables,” says Jamie. “I try to bump up whatever I order. I make sure I get double vegetables.”

Srinika agrees, “You have to make an effort to include vegetables when you go out to eat” as a lot of times the vegetables served up are in very small portions. Protein is just as important she adds “make sure you are getting protein at every meal.”

What does it come down to? Be Sally.

It comes down to “owning your voice and not being afraid of putting your needs out [there],” continues Jamie, about asking for substitutions or requesting a side order. “You are not demanding anything. You are just simply asking is it possible to get this.”

“You can actually maneuver around a menu,” says Jamie, pointing out that it’s very important to become conscious of this fact rather than settling for what is on the menu. “Sometimes if we don’t see something that we like we just order whatever instead of actually realizing that I have a choice here.”

It never hurts to ask. See if you can pair a different side that you want from another menu item with the dish you are planning to order or to ask for that item as a side, without altering the chef’s creation.

Dana agrees adding that more restaurants nowadays are “extremely thoughtful and make it easy to request because there are so many allergies and food sensitivities” in addition to peoples’ rising health consciousness.

“Our bodies are basically like our inner-GPS system,” says Dana. “It tells us how to get to point A to point B. We just don’t listen to it.”

“When you listen to your body she will move you in the direction of the food she wants, which is usually the food that is going to feed you back,” agrees Jamie.

We don’t feel good when we don’t listen. Least case scenario we get an upset stomach. Worst case scenario we get sick or break out.

Dana’s “rule of thumb” is if you are reviewing the menu and are considering a selection, she says, “If you have to eliminate more than three items, you probably should be ordering something else.”

Savoring Life

At the same time, they aren’t about not embracing the adventure, including the wonderful gastronomic world out there. From their perspective, every state, city and country has different food choices that are meant to be explored.

“Let yourself enjoy,” says Jamie. “You are on vacation. Not only that, you are having a new adventure. Part of the new adventure is experiencing the food of the culture.”

“You can have a bite of something and participate without eating all of it,” continues Jamie. “If you are in France and you want to indulge in all of the desserts, because that’s really what you want, do it, but you don’t have to sit down and eat the entire thing. You can have one bite and let the rest go.”

The same with street food, particularly in some countries where you have to be aware of how the street food is prepared, just “make sure you have some digestive enzymes if you have a sensitive tummy and make sure that you are drinking lots of water,” continues Jamie.

“Having enzymes is really a lifesaver,” agrees Srinika, pointing out that they are easily available at any health food store and should be packed for any journey. “So have some of those on hand.”

Some of the ways to savor the adventure is to “choose the healthiest option,” says Dana, but do it in a way where you are able to “feel like you are able to enjoy the food without going into over indulging, but still being able to indulge.”

“Life is to be enjoyed,” says Dana, but there are some sure signs when you have over indulged, particularly with food. “You know when you have over eaten if you can’t comfortably have sex after you’ve eaten.”

“You want to be eating until you are satisfied, because the last thing you want to do is have sex when you’ve eaten too much,” she says.

This article originally appeared on GirlsThatRoam.com

The post Eating well on vacation: Balance is key first appeared on Lesbian.com.

We’ve all been there, enjoying dinner or out grabbing drinks and it happens. You suddenly find yourself surrounded by “interesting” tablemates.

From the sniffling sick folks who sit arm-lengths away (instead of being at home in bed) to fighting couples (half their meal is a fight and the next half is silence), we’ve all been there.

I get it. People are different. To each their own, but in the middle of an open and sexy dining room is not the time or place to unleash your loud gossip, inappropriate sex jokes or lash out at your server.

Last week, while having dinner at a newly opened restaurant it happened — all around me. Maybe it was because I was dining in the heart of the Richmond suburbs or the diverse mix of folks that flock to a new restaurant.

My friend and I were seated next to a husband, wife, toddler and their friend. To keep it brief and accurate, there was a lot of vocal fry, “and I was likes” and Richmond socialite name-dropping. These were the type of folks who proudly spoke above normal volume levels, wanting nearby diners to listen to their oh-so-fascinating lives.

While the wife was in the ladies room, the husband complained to the wife’s friend about the bar scene in this particular area, loudly confiding, “There were no hot women.”

Awkward ears.

I’ve got no problem with your married-but-lady-looking ways, but please don’t boast about it when I’m nearly elbow-to-elbow with you. During the same dinner, the folks sitting on the other side of us treated their server like garbage (I hate this with a passion) and deconstructed their beautiful burgers by removing the bun to make them low carb. Is Atkins still a thing?

To alievitate these situations, engage in a deep conversation with your own dining companion(s) or grab a cocktail to soothe even the noisiest table of ladies who lunch.

Or, turn lemons into lemonade and embrace the experience.

Here’s a prime example, while having dinner with my dad in a low-key eatery, we sat close to a semi-intoxicated redhead perched at the bar. The conversation with her friend was loud and intense, at times yelling. Her life story and relationship woes poured out of her mouth as she shoveled in warm mac and cheese.

It could have been easy to become irritated or throw a few eyerolls, but, after some time, we became captivated by her poignant words, phrases and life philosophies. So much so that we started keeping a log of the real serious stuff that was practically Pinterest-quote worthy. My favorite from her?

“It’s impossible to know who you are, unless you know who you were.”

Damn right.

As a child, my hero, Mr. Rodgers softly sang “won’t you be my neighbor?” This was the approach we were all supposed to take, right? Maybe I feel differently about dining out but after all, we’re all just people, trying to enjoy good food under one roof.

Born a true Texas girl, Bethany U-Hauled to the beautiful, history-drenched city of Richmond, Virginia, for long distance love that eventually ended. In addition to obsessing and writing about Richmond’s food scene (restaurants, festivals, and trends), she’s a connoisseur of painting, aromatherapy, indie music and English accents. Find her stuff at Grub Like A Girl and One Check Or Two.

The post An inconvenient booth first appeared on Lesbian.com.

My partner recently saw an ear, nose and throat doctor. He was looking for an explanation for the chronic sinus issues that have lingered for most of his adult life. In addition to a CT scan, and a DIY nasal rinse, the doctor requested allergy testing. To our surprise, the results indicated significant intolerance for wheat, eggs, peanuts, dairy and brewer’s yeast. I’ve got another friend who can’t eat Stevia without breaking out in hives, and yet another who treats gluten like the plague.

It seems like food allergies have moved from the realm of little kids into the mainstream, and it’s not all a weird diet bandwagon. Research confirms that food allergies are on the rise, and are currently the fifth leading chronic illness in the United States.

Read more at Care2.com

Care2 is the largest online community of people passionate about making a difference.

The post Food allergies are on the rise first appeared on Lesbian.com.

We know that vegetarian and vegan aren’t synonymous with healthy. Junk food vegans and vegetarians do exist. After all, you can technically get a vegetarian burger at Burger King.

Many new vegans flock to PETA’s Accidentally Vegan Food List (which may or may not be entirely vegan — it depends on your personal definition of vegan) and rejoice! Per PETA’s list, Mambas, Oreos and Jujubes are vegan fair game.

Like many people, just because you are a vegetarian or vegan doesn’t mean that you are eating enough fruits and veggies. Delectable (and usually processed) plant-based temptations abound. Good thing vegetarians and vegans have updated food pyramid guidelines to help.

Read more at Care2.com

Care2 is the largest online community of people passionate about making a difference.

The post Food pyramid updated for vegetarians, vegans first appeared on Lesbian.com.

When it comes to the health food industry, there is a lot of promotion of “superfoods.” Slap the superfood label on a product and it’s sure to sell. In fact, considering that there is no legal definition of the word “superfood,” it’s more of a marketing term than anything. Superfoods are essentially foods that do just a little bit more than their counterparts. They go above and beyond, packed full of nutrition, from protein to vitamins to antioxidants. Basically all the foods you know you should be eating.

But while superfoods are good for us, just as their name would have us believe, if we’re thinking about the footprint of our eating habits, not all superfoods are created equal. As the locavore movement grows and there are more and more advocates for eating seasonally and locally, it’s important to consider where our so-called superfoods come from. If you want foods that are packed with nutrients and good for you, you don’t have to buy the stuff that’s marketed as exotic.

Read more at Care2.com

Care2 is the largest online community of people passionate about making a difference.

The post Are superfoods healthy for the environment? first appeared on Lesbian.com.

What to eat for dinner tonight? Tapas to make Penelope Cruz weep? Fusion tacos? Pizza fired in a wood-burning oven imported from Italy? Or maybe just the best turkey sandwich you ever had? The wealth of choice gets overwhelming when you’re in a foodie town like … Orlando.

That’s right; the town best known for a four-fingered mouse who doesn’t eat much of anything has spawned quite a food scene. There is offbeat funkiness to please the toughest San Francisco Mission District hipster, and gourmet quality to reward epicureans for not fleeing to Miami. If you’ve been letting a fear of heavy fried Southern food or pallid lowest-common-denominator offerings keep you from Orlando, hesitate no longer: Orlando’s dining options are putting the shine back in the Sunshine State.

Orlando Goes Gourmet

Let’s assume you decide you want something somewhat upscale, creative, and maybe even locally sourced. A good cocktail and/or a decent wine list wouldn’t hurt, either. Your best bet is Winter Park, a posh suburb of Orlando.

The town’s Park Avenue is lined with gourmet restaurants and wine bars, but the jewel in the crown is undoubtedly Prato (124 N Park Ave, Winter Park, 407-262-0050, events@lumaonpark.com, Prato-WP.com). The spot is named after a city in Tuscany, and is about as far from lasagna and Chianti as you can get. The owners have imported a pair of custom-made Acunto pizza ovens from Naples, which they use to turn out crackly-crusted beauties ranging from the traditional Margherita to more adventurous creations such as butternut squash and sage pizza, and pies topped with sheep’s milk cheese and egg. A whole meal could also be made from outstanding antipasti such as tender octopus in a squid-ink vinaigrette, and fresh chickpeas with lemon and garlic. The traditional-with-a-twist theme continues at the bar, where familiar combinations such as vodka and cranberry might be spiked with basil, habanero bitters, or lava salt. Most progressive of all, Prato is committed to supporting local providers, and a large hand-drawn map of the state at the front of the restaurant shows the location of the many Florida farms Prato has teamed up with.

In Orlando proper, downtown’s Church Street is home to Spanish-themed Ceviche (125 West Church Street, 321-281-8140, Ceviche.com). The large, warmly lit space features a lovely hammered-tin ceiling, and is dominated by two bars: One for cocktails, and a central island offering a stunning array of cold tapas. Warm tapas are ordered off the menu, and really show the kitchen’s genius. On paper, offerings like Serrano ham with Manchego and aceitunas y pimientos don’t sound that different from the bar snacks of Spain, but here tapas is not just to tide you over for a late dinner. Here, tapas is dinner, and each plate is made with the highest quality ingredients. The restaurant’s namesake ceviche bowls are outstanding. Traditional shellfish and pulpo please purists, but tuna with lime and onion has a taste of Hawaii, and Ceviche a la Rusa includes oysters and is served with a shot of Russian Standard Vodka. The food at Ceviche is diverting enough, but there is also live music most nights, usually of the flamenco variety.

The City Beautiful Gets Funky

Now maybe it’s later in the evening. Maybe cocktails have already been consumed. Maybe you just don’t want to change out the sensible shoes you tromped around Universal Studios in. A sandwich from Pom Pom’s Teahouse and Sandwicheria (67 North Bumby Avenue, 407-894-0865, PomPomsTeahouse.com) will certainly fill you up and may just change the way you feel about sandwiches, as well.

The restaurant is the brainchild of Pom Moongauklang, who was born in Thailand, raised in Orlando, and shaped by adult years living in other cities, including New York. Her pan-ethnic background shows in her sandwiches, which might include ingredients ranging from yellow curry to salsa to peanut butter and banana. Probably the best place to start is with Mama Ling Ling’s Thanksgiving, a hot, savory starch bomb that features turkey, stuffing, potato, cranberry sauce, and cheese. It comes with a side of brown gravy for dipping and tastes like Thanksgiving, or like Thanksgiving would if it came with fewer stressed-out relatives and more blue-haired students and funky artwork.

To really see Pom’s fusion skills in full bloom, though, make a visit to her other Orlando endeavor, Tako Cheena (932 N Mills Avenue, 321-236-7457, TakoCheena.com). The tacos (“takos,” here) are served with traditional soft shells, but the fillings are anything but. Panko-crusted cod takos resemble the Baja version but sweet and sour sauce takes them somewhere else entirely.  Peanut chicken and gingery, cilantro-laden pork belly pockets taste like a backpacker’s tour of Asia wrapped in tortillas. Anything but gimmicky, the Mexican/Asian flavors complement each other in ways that will astound the most jaded foodie.

A Snack on the Wildside

Ever bite a gator? If it never occurred to you that human/alligator chompings could go both ways, try the happy-hour gator plate at Wildside BBQ Bar & Grille (700 East Washington Street, 407-872-8665, WildsideBBQ.com) in the colorful Thornton Park neighborhood. Alligator is a white meat that tastes and chews something like lean pork, and goes well with beer.

A True Melting Pot

To what does Orlando owe this surprisingly diverse food scene? Probably the fact that, like Disney World, Orlando lures visitors from all over the world—but Orlando’s new arrivals come to stay. The city is growing faster than any place in Florida save Miami. Some of these new arrivals are first-timers, but many are boomerangs, who, like Pom, tried other places but somehow found themselves back where they started.

How does this happen? What about this city best known for its vacation-from-reality theme parks attracts and sometimes recaptures people from all corners? I asked Pom, and her answer may surprise anyone who assumes that Orlando is as lacking in a sense of place as the fantasy lands that made it famous. “Well,” she says, smiling as she refilled my cup of Rooibos, “There’s no place like home.”

Originally published by GirlsThatRoam.com

Nicole Clausing first flew at the age of two months, an evacuation from her Kentucky birthplace to Western Massachusetts, where she was raised. Since then, she has lived in seven states and visited more than 30 countries.

The post Alligator bites and Flamenco nights: Exploring Orlando’s dining scene first appeared on Lesbian.com.

Think that buying organic meat, eggs, and dairy means the animals were treated kindly? Think again.

The U.S. Department of Agriculture, which regulates the prerequisites for organic certification, has decided that farms don’t really have to meet its animal welfare standards. I guess they were just kidding with that whole we-care-about-animals act. The USDA’s decision to let farms do as they please to animals ignores the recommendation of its own advisory board, while it helps big business.

Read more at Care2.com

Care2 is the largest online community of people passionate about making a difference.

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