Comedian Rosie Wilby

Comedian Rosie Wilby has been making audiences laugh around the world for years. Wilby is based in London, but she has performed in NYC, Australia, the Edinburgh Fringe Show and various other venues in her career. She also has a popular podcast. An out lesbian, Wilby pulls no punches when it comes to calling out sexism and homophobia in the entertainment industry. I sat down with Wilby to chat about the competitive world of comedy, coming out to audiences night after night and the crazy things that happen during a live show.

How did you get into comedy? 

I was a singer songwriter fronting my own band in my twenties and used to always chat between the songs in a fairly self deprecating way. Audiences often said I should have a go at comedy. When the band broke up, I entered a few competitions and found myself getting through to finals and semi finals. There was quite a protracted period where I was doing a bit of both and couldn’t decide between music and comedy. I didn’t really want to do comedy songs and mix them. They’re separate in my head as music is something I feel quite serious about.

The world of stand up comedy is super competitive. How do you stay in the game without losing your sense of humor? 

I think I’ve handled the competition factor by carving out my own niche. My solo shows have tended towards very personal narratives that blend genres (theatre, storytelling, multimedia, comedy). I mean, if I’m telling my own life story, surely people can’t say they’ve heard that somewhere else. Whether they want to hear it is another matter.

As a lesbian comedian, you must be coming out to audiences continually. Does it get exhausting? 

When I started stand up, I would sometimes try and de-gay my set for straight audiences. However, I was getting chatted up by men afterwards. So I thought well maybe I should be honest and gay it up again and hopefully I will get asked out by women. I’ve tried to make my stuff about relationships dwell on the universal aspects and, in general, audiences are cool about queer stuff. I think agents looking for comedians for TV, radio etc often assume that gay acts who talk about their sexuality will be too niche. It’s frustrating because it’s not really the truth. If gay people can listen to straight love stories, then straights can enjoy gay stuff. We are all humans.

You’ve been pretty vocal about the underlying homophobia in comedy. Personally, I love stand up comedy but I’ve been to shows where the comedian takes cheap shots at gay people and it’s definitely led to me going less. Do you think any progress is being made?

When I started, there were a few good comedy nights catering specifically for a gay audience. If Comedy Camp in London hadn’t existed then I probably would have never started comedy. But it was a wonderful event where gay acts and straight female ones would often steal the show. It was frustrating then to find the dynamic reversed at the more ‘mainstream’ events. A lot of these gay comedy nights have now stopped running. There’s an argument for saying that’s a real shame and a valuable space has been lost and one for saying it’s a sign of progress and that gay audiences now feel more comfortable going to mainstream nights. It’s the same uneasy paradox of progress that sees all our historic gay venues here in London closing down. In one way, it’s good that we don’t need them any more. But in another way, profoundly tragic to lose that sense of community. The really interesting thing alongside all this is that women’s comedy nights right across the UK have really grown over the last few years and there are some very good events putting on female acts for (largely) female audiences. Men are welcome in the audience but few come. The events are largely populated by lesbians who clearly feel that mainstream nights still don’t really cater for them. But it’s odd to think that female comedy needs to be a sort of specialist niche that only women will enjoy. Perhaps sexism is more of a persistent problem than homophobia now.

Most stand-up is at least loosely based on the life of the comedian. Has this affected your dating life? Are your exes ready to murder you? 

Maybe you should interview some of my exes! I don’t name them and make things too specific. In fact, my ex-partners have all sort of merged into one generic mass of eccentricity and neuroses. So nobody really knows which one I’m talking about… And sometimes, neither do I.

What is the craziest thing that has ever happened at one of your shows? 

Animal invasions often cause mayhem. I once had a dog run onstage and start eating my props then its owner ran onstage to grab it. Another time, a huge scary looking insect landed on me and I batted it away but it flew towards a bunch of girls on the front row who went absolutely nuts screaming, running around, standing on the chairs. Fire alarms have gone off during crucial moments and everyone has to be evacuated. Lots of disruptions like that.

Do you have any shows coming up? 

I have my Edinburgh Fringe run coming up. I will be on at Sneaky Pete’s on Cowgate from 8-15 August at 5pm.

(Fan of Rosie’s? You can buy tickets for her Edinburgh show here!) 

Any advice for queer lady comedians?

Queer lady comedians – be yourself, enjoy it, talk to and support each other.

Need more Rosie? Find her at www.rosiewilby.com , Facebook.com/rosiewilby and on twitter @rosiewilby

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Cartoonist Tory Hoke

Cartoonist Tory Hoke creates “Meddling Auntie” comics to break the ice between tweens and those who love them on sensitive subjects. “Meddling Auntie” is the concerned aunt that all kids need when they’re growing up. Hoke gives kids someone who isn’t a parent to provide some perspective, in an unconventional format. After previous issues on Drugs, Bullies, and Perverts, in April, Hoke released “Meddling Auntie Presents: Puberty.” In the cartoon, Hoke addresses both the gender issues and same sex attractions that might manifest themselves at puberty and how to handle it. A straight ally, Hoke collaborated with popular editor, writer and podcaster Kristine Chester for perspective in the LGBT community. I sat down with Hoke to discuss “Meddling Auntie” and her creative process, as well as her advice for aspiring female comics.

What was the inspiration behind “Meddling Auntie?”

Tory Hoke: When my niece turned eleven, I was out of ideas for what to get her–what would be interesting and personal and not something she had a dozen of already. So I asked myself, what could I really, really have used at that age? The answer was information–what I wish someone had told me. So I gathered words of wisdom from friends, put funny pictures on it to soften some harsh truths, and gave it to her as a comic.

Things sort of spiraled from there.

Excerpt from “Medding Auntie Presents: Puberty”

Why did you decide to include gender and LGBT acceptance into “Meddling Auntie Presents: Puberty?” 

TH: Ah! Great question. The first couple of comics were very much “this is just my personal experience.” But when I made one about “Perverts”–identifying and dealing with sexual abuse–the feedback from readers showed me that “personal experience” isn’t enough, not when I’m putting something in front of the public.

Puberty is a godawful time of pain and conflict plus crazy-making pressure to pretend everything’s okay. If any kid picks up this comic–a comic that claims to get it, claims to be for them–and doesn’t see themself in it, then that’s a big failure. That’s a terrible failure at a terrible time.

So for “Puberty” I put out a call for help, for more brains and more ideas, and Kristine Chester answered.

Tell me about your collaboration with Kristine Chester. Why did you decide to reach out to her? How did she help?

TH: Kristine’s guidance, her insight, and her perspective–as a younger woman, a trans* woman, and a woman who got even less school sex ed than I did–was absolutely vital. There was so much she wished someone had told her–about puberty’s physical changes, the social changes, what’s possible, what’s normal, all of it. Without her, I don’t think the comic would have happened.

We worked by email, mostly: I sent a script, she sent notes, I sent comic pages, she sent more notes. Our exchanges were a lot of her saying, “Here’s something to maybe consider,” and my answering, “Holy crap, of course!”

Excerpt from “Meddling Auntie Presents: Puberty”

Is  “Meddling Auntie Presents: Puberty” inspired by your own difficult time with puberty? 

TH: Oh yes! And, then as now, a lot of my problems were self-inflicted. I was immature for my age, often thoughtless, sometimes cruel. I think maybe underneath the comic, there’s an idea of, “Look. You’re going to have enough of a hard time. But a lot of the hard time isn’t your fault. Let me let you off the hook.”

What advice would you give to aspiring female comics?

TH: Keep going! Keep making, keep writing, keep drawing. Surround yourself with people who believe in what you’re doing. Seek criticism, take what you like, and leave the rest. Tell the stories that need to be told. Feel free to promote your work, but feel free to let it stand on its own, too. Everything you do is practice for every other thing you’ll do, and there’s no way to guess where the future will take you.

If you would like to read more “Meddling Auntie” visit meddlingauntie.com or purchase the comic for the tween in your life, at Amazon or IndyPlanet

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That’s one hot kiss. Literally.

BY HEATHER HOGAN
AfterEllen

Warning: Lots of spoilers for “Batwoman #23”!

When Kate Kane proposed to Maggie Sawyer all the way back in “Batwoman #17,” all the people who love all the awesome things were ecstatic. It was the first lesbian wedding proposal in the history of mainstream comics, and since Batwoman had been right about foreshadowing the overturn of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” we were buoyed by the thought that she would also be right about foreshadowing the overturn of DOMA and Prop. 8. (She was.) But one thing was missing: Maggie’s answer. Sure, we saw in later issues that Maggie and Kate had moved in together, that they were engaged, that Maggie was trying to reconcile Kate with Batwoman, but we didn’t get that definitive yes, that romantic punch to the gut we were looking for — until this month.

There’s even lesbian spooning.

Read more at AfterEllen.com

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